PODCAST: IONS Lecture: The Wild Ride to 2012

January 30, 2009

Image of a "Strange Attractor"

Image of a "Strange Attractor"

LECTURE for

Institute of Noetic Sciences, Austin Chapter

The Wild Ride to 2012:  Astrology and the Convergence of Multiple Non-linear Systems.

Wow.

Handouts to this lecture and raw notes are available in previous blogs.

Thanks for listening!

Note:  This podcast is about 100 minutes long.  The first 40 minutes are the astrological framework for the next several years, the rest is about converging systems all hitting chaotic levels.     If you start listening and don’t have time to finish, press the pause button and leave your machine on.   When you come back you can just press play and it will pick up where you left it.

01/27/09 References-Lecture Handout

January 27, 2009

The Wild Ride to 2012

References for Lecture

—Anne Beversdorf, Astrologer

www.stariel.com

[email protected]

512 535 0729

 


References

 

Arlington Institute, Dr. John Peterson, Director

http://www.arlingtoninstitute.org/

WHETHER Project

http://www.arlingtoninstitute.org/tai/whether-map

 

HalfPastHuman

http://halfpasthuman.com/

 

Nassim Haramein

First half of 8 hr seminar:

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=6151699791256390335

Research

http://www.theresonanceproject.org/research.html

 

Institute of Advanced Studies, Austin, Texas:  Hal Puthoff, physicist, director

Casimir paper http://arxiv.org/ftp/physics/papers/0408/0408114.pdf

 

Evolutionary “Punctuation”

http://arstechnica.com/journals/science.ars/2006/10/6/5532

 

Astrological/Historical Timelines: See blogs at www.stariel.com

 

Love Without End:  Jesus Speaks by Glenda Green. Spirit Pub. 1998

 

Chaos: Making a New Science by James Gleick. Penguin. 2008 (rev. ed)

 

Astrology: A Place in Chaos by Bernadette Brady. Wessex Astrologer.  2006

 

Psyche and Cosmos by Richard Tarnas  Viking Press.  2006

 

Astrological Data

 

Articles of Confederation

Nov 15 1777, 5:52:56  York, PA

39N58  76W44  Source: David Solte’s Scorpionic America.

 

Barack Obama

Aug 4, 1961, 7:24 pm, Honolulu, HI

Source: Birth Cert copy

 

Innaugural Oath of Office

Jan 20, 2009, 12:06 pm, Washington, DC.

 

Second Oath of Office

Jan 21, 2009, 7:35 pm, Washington, DC

 

Anne Beversdorf is a professional counseling astrologer, artist, lecturer, and workshop facilitator  Her astrological web site is www.stariel.com, and her art website is www.sacred-threads.com. She welcomes donations and client inquiries of all types.

01/25/09 Raw Lecture Notes: Astrology thru 2012

January 25, 2009

Intro:

 

Astrological indicators for the years up to 2012

 

US Articles of Confederation as starting point

 

Vedic and Western indicators of where we are

 

Vedic and Western comparisons to past historical times

 

Saturn, Uranus, Pluto (and Chiron/Neptune) aspects upcoming, compared to 1960’s

 

Adding astrological indications to what else we know about these times (financial astrology; medical astrology—we combine the astrology with what we know about finance or health/medicine,  etc etc)  leading to “futurist” confluence of influences.

 

 

ASTROLOGICAL INDICATORS

 

Scorpionic chart:  Why this chart:  Loans for war

(King of Tennessee)

How it speaks to the reason for the confederation

How it speaks to the country’s priorities (defense spending)

Yogi/Avayogi planets:   Mars=Avayogi   10 4 08

Dasas—microclimates (timeline)

Sun/Mars dasa

 

Predict:  flailing around til Feb 5, spending plans begin.  Rahu is like Mercury, money planet strong in 6th house.  Throw stuff against the wall and see what sticks.  Thru 12 31 09.  In the meantime repeated Uranus Pluto Saturn patterns disrupt more things.

 

Pluto in Capricorn.  Articles of Confederacy Pluto at 28 Cap.   Entire revolutionary buildup and war were Pluto in Cap.    If you were born between 1914-1923, or 1972-78, or if you are an early Capricorn Cancer Aries or Libra, your life will be disrupted directly during this time:  Pluto’s message Rut or Grave:  GET OUT.

 

Equivalent time periods in history:

 

Tarnas: 

Uranus/Pluto:  Widespread revolutionary upheaval, intensified emancipatory impulses, radical cultural innovation.  Collective Will to Power.  Violent rise of mass movements.  Labor unions, revolt of the masses, splitting the atom… p192-3

Saturn/Pluto:  Intense contraction: International crisis and conflict, empowerment of reactionary forces and totalitarian impulses, organized violence and oppression.  Atmosphere of gravity and tension, widespread sense of epochal closure, destruction of an earlier mode of life that in retrospect may seem to have been marked by widespread indulgence, decadence, naivety, denial and inflation.

 

·       Feb 7ish Uranus Saturn on US Uranus.

·       Mid Sept. Sat Uran on US Node

·       Mid Nov. Sat/Pluto on US Pluto

·       2010 1/31 Sat Pluto on US Chiron

·       End of April Sat Uranus

·       Mid May Pluto Mars on Chiron

·       End of July Uranus Saturn

·       2012 June Pluto Uranus on Neptune!

·       June-July Saturn stations on MC

·       Sept Pluto Uranus on POF

 

Prog. Moon to Sun in prog chart

Pluto to S. Node 2012

 

Innauguration chart,

Obama chart and

Swear-in Redo  SICK BABY but 1/6 lord exchange promises healing.  SLOW healing.  HARD work (Sat)  Led by Obama (Sun)

Obama and Redo, major 6th house emphasis.  Debt.  Health care.  Service:  

Predict health care early.  (Kennedy helped)

Predict Obama will lead world in methods for change.

 

 

Eclipses:  Saros Cycles

Jan 26th 2009:  6 Aqu 30

Concern with the need to make sudden reforms.  Old ideas or methods will fail and new systems are required to deal with the events brought by the eclipse.  As a consequence one must think of new ways of handling issues.  Any blocks could be violently or tragically removed. 

 

July 22 09  27 Leo 22

Opportunities to accept greater responsibilities come into people’s lives.  New commitments most likely come as a result of others being unable to carry on.  Although events which herald these opportunities may be difficult, the outcomes, in terms of harmony or self-esteem, are good.

 

Jan 15 2010  25 Cap 01

Brings successful outcomes to long-term worries or illness.  An issue which has worried or drained us for some time will at first seem worse and then clear with successful outcomes.

 

Jul 11 2010  19 Can 24

About groups and associations.  Its energy is about large, ambitious group projects.  These group projects will require a separation or breaking of a bond that already exists.  Individuals may experience this as a separation and then as joint achievement.

 

Jan 4 2011  13 Cap 39

Very similar energy to the previous one:  Expansive energy under which lies a more sinister flavor.  An urge to expand, but the expansion contains frustration, inhibitions, and loss or separation.

 

Jul 1 2011  9 Can 12

Heralds an acute time of confusion in personal relationships, unexpected happenings in financial matters, possible illness.  Unrequited love, despair, confusion, draining of energy, peculiar turns of events.  No important decisions should be made concerting incoming events as there is too much confusion and possible delusion to make clear judgments.

 

Nov 25 2011  2 Sag 37

Tends to bring success.  There have been long periods of hard work from which the success has grown.  There is also the potential for an obsessive idea to finally be accepted, which then leads to the promised success.  Individuals should push for the acceptance of their ideas or methodologies as this eclipse can bring the long awaited breakthrough.

 

May 20 2012  0 Gem 21

A sense of joy through commitment.  A time of good news which entail responsibilities or commitments, but ones in which there is joy in the undertaking.

 

Nov 13 2012   21 Sco 57

Release of tension.  A situation which has been lingering will suddenly clear.  In the clearing of the problem there is also a sense of grief or loss which is not so much personal as belonging to a group or collective.

 

 

Astrological considerations tell us about where the crisis points may appear and some of what they’ll feel like.   But astrologers must apply their knowledge of the situation to fully predict (stock market astrologers, medical astrologers, etc)….  

We’ve looked at the “bare bones” of the astrological picture.   What else is going on that contributes to this.

 

 

 

 

 

 

01/25/09 Raw Lecture Notes: Nonlinear Events Convergence

January 25, 2009

Nonlinear Systems:   Like weather.  Don’t start at point a, move to point b and c and end up at point d.   Influences from all directions subtly change their directions.  Example:  Weather—classic nonlinear system.

 

Weather statistical studies led to the formulation of Chaos theory:   At the point of greatest disintegration, a whole new pattern, never-before-seen, suddenly forms from the broken “molecules” of previous systems.

 

Current Convergence of nonlinear systems includes:

 

1.      Economic system:  John Peterson of Arlington Institute says it has become SO Gi-normous that NO ONE knows how it works.  

2.      Climate change

3.      Species die-offs

4.      Collapse of infrastructure

5.      Old energy systems failing (and new ones unfolding—Hal Puthoff founder of Austin’s Institute of Advanced Studies recently PROVED the Kasimir effect—applicability of zero point energy (from vacuum) in creating usable energy.

 

Related thoughts:

1.   “punctuation” points in the biological evolutionary process—non-linear jumps

2.   convergence of 2012/end-of-world myths

3.   WHETHER project of Arlington Inst,; and Halfpasthuman.com’s monitoring language usage on web—new predictive modalities that scientism can’t explain OR deny.  (halfpasthuman predicts a total collapse of the American gov by mid-year.   Just imagine a handful of mega-katrinas and even the best intended attempt to respond)

4.   Potential tax revolt…. Already growing “failure to file” situation.   Add anger about TARP to failed personal economics…

5.   Nassim Haramein’s new Black Hole Theories… Black holes are not collapsing stars sucking everything in.   They are THE creative points that CREATE their galaxies.   More in a minute.

6.    Noetic Science lecture 16 years ago…   Jim??  10 billion turning point:  10 billion atoms, 10 billion molecules; 10 bill cells, 10 billion ants, 10 billion bees,  10 billion plants (they communicate); 10 billion humans (maybe some no-longer-living can count—Sheldrake’s morphic resonance; morphogenetic fields)

7.   New world leadership focused on interdependence, fairness, dignity, value of each human life.  (I’ve been pinching myself with every new executive order since 1/20)

 

 

METAPHYSICAL Convergences.

1.      12/21/2012, South American monuments, like Stonehenge.  Astronomical condition plus ancient awareness of its importance = ? (black hole theory redux)

2.      “Indigo” and “crystal” children (hate the labels, but…)

3.      Astrological indicators, already discussed

4.      You are Truly Loved:  Glenda Green.   Fire= energy of destruction.  

5.      Puthoff (and other electrogravitic energy systems) ARE energies of Attraction

 

 

BIG BANG

Pluto in Cap—American Revolution.

Peterson says we are getting ready to go through something SO MUCH bigger than the American Revolution we can’t begin to imagine it. 

2012—I’ve resisted “magical thinking” about this date for a long time.    But I’m rethinking the possibilities in light of the previous information.

 

Haramein’s black holes:   Points of vast creative principle.   His math (peer-reviewed, published within last month) also shows that every atom contains a black hole, every human being contains a larger black hole.

 

Dream… Uranus/Neptune…  (1st 2 planets past Saturn) and what they told me.    Ergo, Gaia = not only a huge black hole but a very conscious one.

 

What happens when resonance hits?   Bridge collapse for example….   12 21 2012 WE hit resonance, with NO interference from galaxy, with Galactic Center.

 

Peterson says he anticipates a new human being—that we will shift, to become highly psychic, with values of interdependence, caring, etc., and will operate simultaneously in the physical AND the non-physical world.    Can you already feel this?

 

 

 

 

Convergence of positives:

 

1.      Obama’s tone of leadership—transparency, kindness, extended hand of friendship, concern for all, not just powerful few

2.      Indigo, crystal children, the shift is happening

3.      New energy systems about to break in (more than geothermal, wind, solar)

4.      2012 alignment

5.      simultaneous breakage of old, dysfunctional forms.

 

 

General:

 

Money and property will eventually be gone:  People will have the power to build, create, etc., combined with the awareness that all creation should benefit all.   Those driven to exceed basic survival will also be driven to help more people.  The richest people will be the most magnanimous in helping all.

 

Shared homes, resources.   Hands out to help each other, not to grab.

 

Strength of small local communities, augmented by mind-sharing across the globe (internet, plus psychic).  Psychic travel replaces jets.

 

Heightened ability to create physical reality based on highest-good dreams.   Intention for good allies with ability to manifest dreams into physical form.

 

Don’t expect to wake up and see this tomorrow.   First we’ve gotta become caterpillar goo.   Which can be scary.    When fear hits, just remember it’s caterpillar goo and the butterfly will follow.    As we approach 2012, the conscious and consciously cohesive intention of those of us with a modicum of enlightened awareness will create the shift, so for the good of all, turn fear into caterpillar goo and welcome the melt-downs.

 

01/25/09 Pluto Events Through History

January 25, 2009

Below are dates and events of Pluto’s transit through the cardinal signs.   The Cardinal Signs affect the world at large, and these time periods are roughly linked together.

1913-14 Pluto Enters Cancer

 

(1913-1924 births are experiencing a Pluto Opposition now and over next few years)

 

1913    World War 1

            Harriet Tubman dies (remember Hillary’s speech quoting her?)

            Federal Reserve Created

            16th Amendment removing restrictions to Federal Income Tax

17th Amendment authorizes direct elections of Senators AND

      gives Governs the  right to appoint them in case a senator leaves office

US Revenue Act of 1913—re-establishes new Federal Income Tax

 

1914    Federal Trade Commission

            Clayton Anti-Trust Act

            Mothers Day created

            ABC Powers (Argentina, Brazil, Chile, work together for S.Am interests)

           

1915    Birth of a Nation—film

            Lusitania sinks

 

 

1972, Pluto enters Libra

 

Nixon visits China & Soviet Union

Israeli Athletes killed at Olympics

HBO launched

Pong—first commercial computer game

Nike launched

Fedex launched

McGovern drops Eagleton

George Wallace shot

SSI (disability) begins

WATERGATE

Joy of Sex—first edition

ERA passed congress

Title IX passed

 

 

PODCASTS: Jyotish Conversations (Vedic Astrology)

January 22, 2009

ganeshaThis is a series of podcasts on the rich subject of Indian astrology, known as Jyotisha, and sometimes called Vedic Astrology.   You can listen to more podcasts about Jyotisha at www.puja.net.   This page is podcasts 1-5.

First, a brief description of each podcast, followed by the podcasts.  I hope you will enjoy these.—————–

PODCAST ONE:  Astrology Across Cultures

When reading an astrological chart, the chart is not the only thing to examine.  You also have to think about the cultural background of the person and the opportunities in their country and larger culture.   Astrology trends change over the course of history, too.   Listen to learn more!——————-

PODCAST TWO:  The Role of the Moon in Jyotish (Vedic Astrology)

The Moon is the most important single planet in the India-n system astrology.  This podcast will tell you why.————————–

PODCAST THREE:  Predictive Astrology:  What’s Involved?

What’s most important–transits, dasas, or something else?—————-

PODCAST FOUR:  Astrological Omens and Remedies

One of the brilliant parts of Vedic Astrology is the deep system of remedies for astrological “problems”.  The problems can be in the birth chart, or they can be a temporary situation, but with resonant energy systems we can tweak the energies.  This one is fun.————–

PODCAST FIVE: Divisional Charts

Jyotish includes a technique for extrapolating from the birthchart a different chart for many large subject areas of life.   We’ll talk about them.   CORRECTION:  At the beginning I mention the Drekkana chart.   It’s about SIBLINGS, not children.   Foot-in-mouth problem!

PODCAST SIX:  Looking at 2009

Here we look at the year 2009, applying techniques from jyotish.   The innauguration of Barack Obama, the chart of the United States, and more!

01/15/09 Timeline of History last time the US was in this Dasa cycle

January 15, 2009

One way of looking at periods of history in a long timeline, like the lifetime of a COUNTRY, is to examine the Jyotish (India-n astrology) planetary “microclimates”, the DASAS.   Since these repeat every 120 years, we can gain some hints of the kinds of environment we will be in if we simply look for the same period last time it came around.

The challenge is figuring out which chart to use as a starting point.   I’m looking at the United States, and the “chart of the US” is truly in high dispute.   Most Indian astrologers (and many others) point out that the Declaration of Independence is not a birth of a nation at all.   It’s more like an “I want a divorce” statement.  England still owned us, and we had a bloody revolution ahead of us before we became a country.   We might be able to see ideals and dreams (and yes, rebellion) in such a chart, but this isn’t the birth of a nation.

The late David Solte of San Diego did a phenomenal amount of research into what constitutes “countryhood”.   Long story short, a place is not considered a country, among the nations of earth, until it has the capacity to borrow or lend money.   During the revolutionary war, we were in dire need of money, but no one would lend to a group of colonies.   There was no “United” here—just 13 colonies who had citizens who wanted free of British Rule (and King George III’s tax and monopoly policies!).   France and Holland looked at Franklin and Adams and said “who’s gonna pay us back???”

Sooo…   The Continental Congress came up with the Articles of Confederation  Saturday, November 15, 1777 at 5:52:56 PM (LMT) in York, Pennsylvania.    This document stated that the 13 colonies would be joined by a common government, and that our common government would vouch for the loans we requested.   Bingo.  Money came, we won the war, then came up with our own taxes and monopolies.

The period of time equivalent to 2009 in the last round of events was late in 1888.   Then, as now, we were running the Dasa of Sun/Mars.   Mars happens to be the avayogi planet (the planet bringing financial loss) for the Articles of Confederation chart.   We entered Sun/MARS on October 1, 2008.   Hmmm.

The timeline below shows event highlights from those times so you can see for yourself how tremendously active, politically, economically, and in social justice, 1890 was, and what came before and after.

Timeline of US history relating to dasas of now.

 

1873-1890—Gilded Age

 

1881        Rise of Robber Barons

1883    Birth of Labor movement

1885    Nadir of race relations

1886        Haymarket Riot

1887        Interstate Commerce Commission

1887    Yale College becomes Yale University

 

1888        National Geographic founded

1888    Internationally, the last country with legal slavery made it illegal

 

1889        Johnstown Flood

1889    Hull House founded

1889    Major political reallignment leads to progressive era.

 

1890        How the Other Half Lives book by J. Riis.

1890    University of Chicago founded

1890    Sherman Silver Purchase

1890    AFL founded

1890    Battle of Wounded Knee

1890    Women’s Suffrage Org founded

1890    SHERMAN ANTI-TRUST LAW

1890    McKinley Tariff (HIGH import taxes created economic chaos at home)

1890    Yosemite National Park created

 

1892    Carnegie Steel Strike (10 deaths)

1892    American Psychological Association founded

1892    Pledge of Allegiance started, to commemorate 1492

1892    General Electric Founded

1892    Sierra Club founded

1892    Homestead Strike—labor lockout

 

1893-1897 Depression  

      1893   Panic of 1893

                  Sherman Silver Purchase REPEALED

      1894    Pullman Strike

                  INCOME TAX starts

      1895    H.G. Wells publishes The Time Machine

      1895    Roentgen discovers X-Rays—used to see through matter

      1896    Gold strike in Klondike

 

 

 

 

 

 

Pluto in tropical cardinal signs

 

1760  King George II dies and George III takes English Throne (this is the George we fought against)

 

1762  Pluto enters Capricorn

Catherine the Great ascends to throne of Russia  (also Venus/Sun occultation)

Rousseau’s Social Contract

Industrial Revolution (steam)

 

1765 the infamous Stamp Act.

 

1823-1852 Pluto in Aries. 

This period saw the rise of insane asylums instead of prisons for the mentally ill.

1829—Election of Andrew Jackson: The People’s President

1839:  Amistad—slave ship taken over by its black “cargo”.  Subsequent trial when they land states that they are free men and women.

1842  Oregon Trail begins.

1850  Womens Rights Convention

1852  Uncle Tom’s Cabin published by Harriet Beecher Stowe

—————–

 

 

Timeline of US history relating to dasas of now.

 

01/12/09 Finding more info on this site

January 12, 2009

As I learn more about building this site and posting information and blogs, I realize that you may actually be looking for real astrological content, not just commentary.

There are two places to look here for astrological content:  One is under the menu bar called “ARTICLES”, the other is under the menu bar header “Astro-Remedies”.  

As I continue to add material to this site I’ll cross-post, letting you know in the “what’s new” section that there are new articles and information uploaded to the menu bar pages.   Look for more information in the next few weeks!

–Anne

01/07/2009 Self Esteem & Body Image

January 7, 2009

I was walking the dog last night, thinking of extensions of the conversations I had with the women mentioned in the previous posts.   The self-esteem issues.   Body image stuff.   Ugh.   Boy have we been sold a bill of goods on what we SHOULD look like.  

I would LOVE to look like Audrey Hepburn–at any age.   Instead, I look like an older, fatter (brunette) Renee Zellweger.   No matter what I do I’ll never look like Audrey Hepburn.    My face is composed of circles:  a circle for the nose.  Two big cheek circles, a circle for the chin.  There are no angles here.  Even as a skinny teenager there were no angles in my face.   It’s great for aging.  Those puffy cheeks take years off my real age.  Hepburn was all angles.   

And unlike Renee, I don’t have the time or money for draeconian trainers to work me over for hours a day, and there’s no one preparing just the right foods to keep me satisfied while I lose weight.  Generally I forget to eat til I’m ravenous, and then grab the fastest thing around, which usually isn’t the best “diet” choice.

So where is it written that any of us–men and women who have jobs, multiple commitments, more to do than we can complete and less help than we need in any area of our life, SHOULD look like those whose careers ARE their bodies.    (I bet you didn’t know that in the astrology of India (Jyotisha), the planetary pattern that always used to mean prostitute is almost always present in the chart of actors.   The pattern means They Sell Their Bodies.   It’s their job to look seductive!)

I’ve lost some weight.  I could lose more.   But my face is still pudgy, my neck (Aargh!  –you’ve gotta read Nora Ephron’s I Feel Bad About My Neck!!  http://www.bookreporter.com/reviews2/0307264556.asp .   It’s priceless:  Laugh Outloud Funny).    When I’m pressured and draw my shoulders up, my head sinks down like a turtle and my neck turns into a chin-making factory.  I’ve counted six or seven at my most stressed.    So I try to relax and drop my shoulders.   But you know what?   This is me.  This is how I look.   I SHOULD look like I look.   If I had no stress I might look better, but given life, stress, schedules, etc, the only should is that I look like a human being.   I do.  Pretty much.  Most of the time.  (well, there was that one morning at a conference when my hair was doing its best imitation of an abyssinian guinea pig.)Abyssian Guinea Pig

There are some places where the pressure to look like someone else is a lot bigger than in other places.  Maybe I’m wrong, but I think the worst is Southern California.   I lived there for 22 years.   It’s impossible to feel like you look good there.   I don’t care how thin you are, how impeccable your hairdo and makeup and clothes, how many people look at you and feel even worse about yourself because you’re so gorgeous, it’s almost guaranteed that you’ll feel bad about how you look.   

Now I live in Austin, Texas.   There are standards here, too.   But they are less rigid.  Definitely not “cookie-cutter” standards.  Not Barbie-doll standards.   There’s more of an emphasis on individuality, on character.  I don’t see as many boob-jobs here, either.

If you take a look at the advertising industry, it’s almost all based on making you feel inadequate–until you buy whatever they’re selling.   I dare you to watch a half-hour of commercial TV without seeing some message that tempts you to think you’ve got a problem that can only be solved by spending money.  

Enough already!   You Should Look like you look.   You Should Have what you have.   Eat what is necessary, enjoy what’s already around you.   You can wish to look like someone else.    You can wish to be a different person.   It won’t happen.   Get used to it—get used to You.    (hey–I can help–contact me for an astrology reading!)

01/07/09 Self Esteem?

January 7, 2009

Over the last several days I’ve had no less than FOUR conversations with attractive women who question their self-esteem.  Why?   Because they have been so generous they have given far more than they received, til they suddenly realized they were just depleted.

 I know it’s normal psycho-babble to call this a symptom of “lack of self-esteem”, but there’s something very twisted, to me, in linking generosity to low self esteem.  It just doesn’t “smell” right.   Are we a society who must find ways to bad-mouth generosity???   Are we really that selfish?   (Looking at current economic crises, I think maybe we are, and we need to examine some of the causes of this selfish greed that has led to such a nasty crash.)   But besides the social/definition-related issues, this argument simply gives us one more thing to beat ourselves up with.  “Oh, I have low self-esteem.  I’m doing everything wrong.  I have to fix this terrible problem.”   I don’t think this kind of labeling helps anything.

 In these various conversations, I started to realize that sometimes this “lack of self-esteem” generosity is simply the result of training and habits.   For example, take me (why not!).   My Dad was always saying “What’s wrong with you.  You think the world revolves around you.  You’re utterly selfish.  You’re not the center of the Universe.   I’ve got to do everything around here.”   On one level, some of this is justified stuff to say to a child.   To some extent we all need to learn to pay attention to others in our environment.  On the otherhand, there’s nothing wrong with a child being self-absorbed.   This is as natural as it could possibly be.   ALL children think they are the center of the universe.  ALL children will do what they want before they do what someone tells them to do –until training, or fear, or insecurity changes this. But the result of this repetition was that I began to believe I was selfish, and tried as hard as I could to be more generous, etc.   Then one day, when I’d gone WAY out of my way for a friend who was “desparate” for help, only for her to say cavalierly “oh, never mind” and leaving me holding the bag….   I realized with a shock—Hey–I’m NOT selfish!   This effort for my friend was NOT the act of a selfish person.”

Getting back to the point though–training and habit.   My dad trained me to look out for others.   In retrospect, his constant physical health issues plus a (frankly) rather narcissistic personality can reframe some of his complaints as simple projections:  “*I* need to be the center of attention around here, and instead it’s always you kids.”   So I was trained.   And I developed habits of doing more and more for people who didn’t appreciate it, just as I was trained to do.   This isn’t a problem of lack of self-worth.   It’s a problem of habit and training.    Over years, I learned to watch myself, and realize when I was the one doing ALL the giving and the other person doing all the receiving.   I started noticing who always asked for help but never responded if I asked.   I learned to test situations by occasionally (heaven forbid!) ASKING for help.    And I learned that if you do too much giving, you’ll only get two results among your acquaintances:  Really good people will eventually become uncomfortable with their inability to keep up your pace of giving, and will back out of the relationship; and the ones who remain will be Users.   So it’s worth watching.

But talking to two of these friends, who are such wonderfully generous people, I just got more and more upset with the equation of great generosity = low self esteem.   Let’s stop beating ourselves up and simply learn better habits!

01/04/09 Anne’s Speaking Schedule

January 4, 2009

Forgot to mention, I will be making two astrological presentations in January.  

     The first is January 15, 7:30 pm at Plumblossom Wellness Center  (on South Lamar) in Austin, Texas.  I’ll be part of a panel sponsored by the Astrological Society of Austin, and we’ll be looking at astrological trends for 2009.  The public is welcome and there is no charge.  (I don’t know how the italics got here and can’t turn them off–sorry). 
Plumblossom‘s site (info, addresses, etc) is http://www.plumblossomwellness.com/events.php
Astrological Society of Austin’s site is http://astrologyaustin.org

     The second is January 27 at 6:30 pm, at the Austin History Center  (former Carnegie Library on Guadalupe) in Austin.  This is another astrological preview of the coming year, by me (solo).   The event is a regular meeting of the Austin IONS group, a local group of the Institute of Noetic Sciences.   Again, it’s open to the public and there’s no charge.

IONS in general, and the Austin IONS specifically are great groups.  IONS was founded in the 1971 by astronaut Edgar Mitchell to study the link between science and MEANING.   As a result, IONS is very involved in global consciousness studies, new scientific research that supports this, and many other fascinating and cutting edge ideas.   Check out their national website and you’ll have a ton of great ideas, thoughts, and information at your fingertips.

Austin History Center’s (address) www.ci.austin.tx.us

Austin IONS site (schedules):  http://www.main.org/ionsaustin/

IONS sitehttp://www.noetic.org/

     If you’re near Austin, Texas this month, I’d love to see you at either–or both–of these venues!

–Anne

01/04/09 What’s Up with this Blog.

January 4, 2009

Another cold front blew in last night.  I wonder if that’s what got me up so early (for me–5 hrs of sleep is early no matter what the time!) and totally excited about working on my web sites.   And blogging.

Right now, the biggest thing on my mind is learning more about Photoshop and WordPress, which you don’t want to hear about.   So what I’ll do instead of telling you what’s on my mind is tell you what I’ll be blogging about, which, this post aside, will be blogging about what’s on my mind.

For years I’ve been known to read, hear, or just plain think about something odd, and then tell everyone I run into about my current monomania.   My interests tend to cluster around the “new” sciences, future studies, astrology (of course), astrology sessions with clients that make me think something new-to-me about the human condition, politics (recently especially, but I won’t go into that much here for now), and my own personal Aha’s (psycho-spiritual personal growth).  

This Christmas, the whole family was here in Texas–first time since 1964.   It was really a spectacularly successful family get-together, if I do say so myself.   And of course, I noticed–again–that our family’s style of conversation is generally sequential monologues on whatever topic is the current obsession of the individual family member speaking.   It works for us–we’re all used to it.   It will possibly work for blogging, too, even as I welcome you to add your own comments.  The only way it can possibly work in conversations with friends is if I’m either interested enough for them to keep listening, or they’re patient enough to put up with it.  

Sometimes my brainstorms get sent off to someone as an email.   I think some of those may be worth reposting if I get stuck.   This is a work in progress, and the more folks involved the merrier it will be for all.  

For now…   this is enough!

Anne